Happy VD , I like abbreviations

in #hive-1962333 years ago

Lets Shout it from the rooftops!

This is not financial advice, DYOR and seriously anyone making any decisions based on what I say probably has a screw loose anyway

WhatsApp Image 2022-02-14 at 7.40.13 PM.jpeg


Why you should get married on Valentines day.

Contrary to what some of those paperbacks tell you...

Lets start off with some profound advice before we get into this.

  • Heaving Bosom?
  • Throbbing Member?
  • Spontaneous Dizziness and shortness of breath?

Might want to have a doctor take a look at that, sounds like a potentially serious medical condition.

Life is much more fun than a Romance novel makes it out to be.


Well once again its Valentines day everybody, and once again Its me again basically spouting my brand of nonsense to the world. Now Rather than glorify all the sappy reasons you might hear from other people about getting married on Special days.

Let me keep it real.

Me and my wife decided to get wed in unholy matrimony 18 years ago today.

Saint Valentines day. The Naked dude in a diaper firing heart shaped arrows at any ass dumb enough to be sticking up in the air this time of year.

Why The 14th of February? Why be so cliché?

*Well I will tell you Mon Ami! *

Because strangely enough my great uncle was a Holy Roller preacher man and that's the only day that was open for us at his church.

Guess everyone else thought it was overdone too.

But We got a Free Church, Free Service, and a free after party organised by some pretty damn awesome neighbors,family and friends. So...

Winner.

Now let me tell you about the extremely helpful benefits to this turn of events.

  • It is Practically Impossible to forget your Anniversary
  • You get to combine 2 Gift Days into one
  • You give all of your single friends an extra reason to hate you

Biggest downside...

  • Anniversary and Valentines Day Sex Have to be combined into a single day. Which is way more difficult once you have kids, trust me.

So Now that one is out of the way I have to be fair, we got married young, and most of our family and friends had bets going on the Divorce date.

I'm pretty sure they all owe us money now.

Yup no worries to everyone who owes us, I do accept Bitcoin.

So Where was I going with this anyway? What the fuck are you bangin on about this time @rubido?

Well Love of course. That Big L word that can be difficult to say and even harder to actually find.

After 18 years there's still nothing else I want to find in a woman I don't already have, and while I may not be loaded with cash or rolling in the proverbial dough.

I'm Happy.

So Here's to another 18 and more and I honestly can say in spite of the bad times the good ones more than make up for it.

So wherever you are and whoever your with, Alone or with someone special, even if its that dude you randomly got to buy you dinner on Tinder...

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Happy Fuckin Valentines day.


The Image (s) are courtesy of My 7 year old son and depicts me and my Wifes undying love.

We are hugging and kissing from our tentacles which happen to grow from our face while kissing the air in eachothers general directions.

True Love.

Yes I paid Him for it, and yes it now lives on the fridge. Any fucking questions?

Side note...
Neither of these pictures do the size of my butt chin justice. trust me, its better in Technicolor.


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Yeah I used this picture 3 times, It cost me 10 bucks. I might make it an NFT.

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Happy anniversary to you both. Have fun, and , here's to many more years.

Thanks @smithykins hope you had a wonderful 💕 day too!

Thanks alot and have a good one 👍

Happy VD to you too... Hope you have some penicillin on hand...!!!😎

Fully stocked and ready for anything, got me a discount at Apoco- Mart!

When you say holy roller, do you mean Free Will or Primitive Baptist? Or one of those Assembly of God outfits?

That definitely needs to be an NFT!

Aye would make a pretty damn fine NFT in my book. As for the holy Rollin, more free will pentecostal than much else, he got convertametad after Nam.

(dude was an army chaplain since WW2 where he was stationed in England and met his future wife.)

Long story short after holding a whole lot of bodies in the last minutes he thought god might have more to offer.

So he then spent the rest of his life looking after orphans, adopting teenagers (in a non pervy way) and generally doin good for everyone else. Man took a second mortgage on his house to build a battered women n kids shelter.

RIP uncle Chuck.

Long story short after holding a whole lot of bodies in the last minutes he thought god might have more to offer.

Interesting, usually that seems to elicit the opposite reaction. My grandfather ended WW2 as head surgical nurse in what was that war's equivalent to a MASH unit. He'd joined the Guard for eating money while he was going to school to become a doctor, when Pearl Harbor was bombed his unit was one of the first called up. Never had a thing to do with doctoring or religion after he got back from that.

RIP Chuck, sounds like you were an alright dude.

Aye he was pretty damn cool, I think after so many years of service he was stuck with looking for some kind of meaning. Guess cause shit happens didn't float his boat.

Regardless the guy did lots of good and no real harm so imma say fair enough.

Your gramps sounds like he had the right idea by me.

When you gonna do some photos of fruit? Keep seeing those kinda things in my windows. On second thought keep doin good photos, otherwise I got nuffink to aspire toooooooo.

P.s. found a source for MTG cards in ENGLISH... In France how fuckin awesome is that.

The ads was hilarious haha

Make an NFT!!!

Happy Valentine's! For another 18 years let's goooooo!

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I would never get away with combining two gift days into one.

For seven years old he nailed those tomatoes.

👍🏿 Tom!

Somehow it always ends up more expensive, Like double the presents... I tried this

but somehow it never caught on.

Maybe I just needed a bigger box? More wrapping paper? Less Toms?

So here's what just happened. I was gonna make sure to say you know I'm a huge JT fan right? Then I was gonna copy:

Maybe I just needed a bigger box?

Would've responded something like I've never heard a dude say that until now.

Then I clicked play! Ah, ICY. Just so you know, it's all your fault that one and this are in your VD comment sesh.

XOXO

Niiiice, The box size can be confusing if you don't know the ʏɿoƚꙅʞɔɒd.

That's more my speed if I only manage the single gift route,Sock,Sofa,watch youtube.

Gotta be fair tho otherwise its the Best sesh VD ever had, Normally it gets all the boring comments.

VD ain't VD without this holiday favorite.

Too far? I shoulda stopped at Jizz huh?

Nah never too far, unless you need a bucket, then it's only too far if ya can't empty it

So a 44 Oz cup still isn't too far?

Only if it has a 2 girls tag, then we might have to adjust the community for future posts.

Thankfully that VD wasn’t a venereal disease!

Happy anniversary to you and your wife! Kids and nobody around to help watch them surely makes for tough chances for fun time, I’m sure you’re in a similar situation.

That’s great for you, I love unique things like that. My wife and I had something unique ourselves. We tried to plan something traditional but with our own spin on it. Assholes will get the best of you though, especially the fuckers that are related to you. We said fuck it, did everything our way and none of them were there. Looking back that was one of the many bridges those idiots burned. Sorry not trying to dampen the festive spirit!

I hear you on being happy with what you’ve got. Things might not be the easiest or include as much of the sexy time as I’d like but there’s nothing like a good woman in my opinion. Our relationship is about a lot more of the deep connection stuff and that’s what lasts us for the long haul when other things get in the way or change up a bit. Finding someone you can handle the tough times without hating or wanting to kill them and getting over and/or through the issues means so much more than a lot of the superficial stuff.

Here’s to 18 more!
*raises a cup that says venereal disease on it

Aye I get ya, somehow didn't get the bell for this one until now... Must be the matrix buggin out again.

We're lucky that we have a few good friends we can dump the lad on for an hour or 2 here. Long enough to get home, knock the dust off the proverbial romance and have a cup of coffee.

Sometimes there aint anything better than a deep connection, It makes it easier to prevent any 'accidents' around the house. Falling anvils, power tool related accidents. 'Sorry officer, I asked her to hold the other end of the chainsaw while I started'

Those sort of things.

Good to have you here man, always a pleasure!

Raises his CVS Pharmacy Mug

All good man! Haven’t had a hell of a lot of time to be on chain myself lately, wife is recovering from pneumonia so I’m doing double duty to make sure she’s doing okay.

We had a nice event back last fall where we were able to drop the little man off at a school he was going to for a few hours. That’s the first bit of help we’ve had in too long and the last since. Hoping when we move we can get to a place where we will have good people around to watch him for an hour or two.

Yeah those accidents tend to happen when there’s a murderous fire in someone’s eye towards their partner. We know some people that have that type of shit, albeit not literally murder, and are thankful we don’t sweat the small bullshit that we see them do lol.

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