The Signs

The signs

I use the gifted gap
to find my feet a bit
my glow comes back
my healthy fit

My Vibe

I start to dance again
and so
the crowd begins
to turn away

but I see it now

because now I see the signs

So he shared my private story
with a village
After I only told him
to protect him

To help him

but because I said no to more
it happened again
so wide and commen
they took it to school

adults using
Children
adults hurting
Children.

But nobody wants to talk about it.

This might be criminal
This
Considered harassment
by the book

But since Silence is enforced
Around Here
instead of the law -
I am she who must obey

Because, these days, I know the signs

One of them is a cop;
One a lawyer;
The church won't give me space to do service for the community;
That doctor had no time for me;
A man veered his car towards me while I was walking to the village
to scare me

I see the signs clearly

A woman told me she'd been threatened and I supported her
Another that she'd been frightened
and I supported her
Another story was shared
and I supported her #too

but that post on social media
disappeared

And when I asked for help
the women
were all too scared
and some of the men were #too

I see the signs now

So I shared my private story
on social media
to remove their ammunition
and to protect my son

because I didn't do anything wrong

#alittlebitdeeper

Perhaps this
only made them more angry
because things
escalated

More

I flirted with a dark-skinned man
because he didn't put a ring on it
and He Followed Me
to get my number

Then I got busy and said no thanks.

He didn't stop messaging, though
and this may also be
some kind of harassment
but I don't really know

because this is normal
where I try to live
and it's allowed
and even encouraged

Even when I found out he was married and I know his wife.

I Am protective of her
because she's a young mother
Beautiful
Gentle
Strong
and works all day long
to make sure the family survives
while he plays
And nobody thinks
this is wrong

I see this as a sign

I lost my shit
because I like her
and I'm tired
of boys being boys
so I told him to grow up
To be a good father
To be a good man
To protect his family
To set a good example
for his son

But I reckon he pulled the race card to protect himself

An easy way out
but I'll never know
because nobody asks
the woman's side of the story
where I come from

Especially the women.

This works both ways
#too
and how does that work
I wonder?

When some of the men
are also #too
afraid
to speak

And how ironic
When I lost everything
Fighting Racism
And a lie

But it's because of this, that I now can see the signs

And so my car was vandalized
in broad daylight
in the middle of the village
and nobody will talk

Or make eye contact with me

It's a car I can't afford anyway
but I'm getting too tired to walk
some days
And this happens to others #too

I see the signs, as people look away

I see the whispers
in their eyes
and know
he's lied

The smear campaign.

So inevitable
it's not hard to see
the signs
but nobody here wants #too

Here we go again.

Perhaps they think I'm Muslim because
Out Of Respect
I covered my head
when I shopped at That café

Even though I'm not religious
and affiliate myself with no
One
And us All

But nobody asks
Me
What's been said
or done

I'm a woman in South Africa
alone
and this makes me prey
and also a threat

to some

And I know the signs
these days, these days
I know #enough
to know when not to speak

And even when the truth
becomes clear
over time
everything remains the same

Yes

I recognise the signs

Maybe Only Human
Nature
The green eyed monster
'cause I was getting stronger

It doesn't really matter
when I have to lay down
and rest
for two days

So It is important
To see the signs Clearly Now
Because she also claims
to be a "good Christian"

And they know I'm sick, by the way

#religiousbutnotspiritual #notonlymen

I took the rubbish out
this morning
and had a conversation with a man
who also sees the signs

It's dangerous, I said. At the end.

He nodded
and said yes.
They are
dangerous.

He's seen these signs
#too
because he works at the rubbish dump
on a Sunday morning

But I don't need a man to agree
to make me
accept the signs
I see

Not anymore.

I look for other places
but I'm only allowed to live
where that other man
allows me #too

They'd be outraged
if they knew
but only if I
were a man

I know the signs
and there's nothing I can do
when I'm Guilty
Until Proven Innocent
And even then
they turn away
Because now they're embarrassed
or ashamed

At their mistakes

So I start to smoke again
because I don't want to live
here anymore
And I can't really live like this

None of us can live like this.

But when Will We See the signs?